Originally posted by snagglepuss Tell me..,do you ever have any empathy for your fellow human beings who are not quite as perfect as you seem to think you are?? People lose their jobs unexpectedly sometimes, are paying huge rent and have food to buy for their families.

I do, but the constraints are quite narrow:

If you lost your job through no fault of your own, have been looking for employment seriously since being out of work, have burned out your >=3 months savings, severance and EI and cut back your lifestyle significantly to fit within your new limitations and also kept yourself current in your chosen field while did have a job, I feel empathetic towards your situation.

Hence why they run into tight situations where they may not be able to make every single payment to an outside company. This does not give that company the right to harass you in order to get their monies owing.

A few letters maybe, but calling at all hours - I think not. The person may be having a hard enough time without being constantly reminded that they owe money to some money-hungry credit-card company. Credit companies have to understand that they'll get their money - it will just take some time perhaps.

A few letters, increasing in intensity, and then harassment. Immediate harassment, I agree, is uncalled for. If you do not respond to the letters, harassment is geared to get a response out of you and is justified.

Calling at 7am increases the likelihood of reaching somebody when they could otherwise not.

I don't know why you're so surprised by the above article, any enlightened person could have told you this.....provided one reads the paper and keeps themselves apprised of happenings.

I said that I used to be surprised, but am not anymore. The stupidity of the great unwashed is quite apparent to me now. I think it was a denial mechanism that made it difficult to believe that there were so many masochists in this country.

As with the discussions elsewhere, the education is there and people repeatedly refuse to internalize it.

Originally posted by mbg If you do not respond to the letters, harassment is geared to get a response out of you and is justified.

Harassment is never called for and is not legal in our country.

Originally posted by ronnie99 Harassment is never called for and is not legal in our country.

Hence the problem with people not paying their bills on time and thinking that it is acceptable behaviour.

FYI, my comments are not intended to be towards Moustachia. I feel bad about that situation and it is different from what I am talking about.

Originally posted by mbg Hence the problem with people not paying their bills on time and thinking that it is acceptable behaviour.

I never said I thought not paying bills was acceptable, however in most cases these things could not have been easily prevented.

I also don't think that a non-support paying parent should cause financial problems for his/her ex-spouse and children, apparently there was reason for the support orders to be made the amount and types that they were, why should the remaining spouses pay for this physically and mentally?

Originally posted by ronnie99 I also don't think that a non-support paying parent should cause financial problems for his/her ex-spouse and children, apparently there was reason for the support orders to be made the amount and types that they were, why should the remaining spouses pay for this physically and mentally?

Agreed.

Originally posted by roxxyroller Non-support paying parent=deadbeat dad's, and there are so many of them out there! You're good enough to have sex with...but not good enough to be cared for.

This is a far more complicated subject than is worth getting into in this forum, but please do not refer to all "non-support paying parents" as "deadbeat dads". There are plenty of women who do not pay support as well. Stereotypes are part of what has made family law the mess it is today.

That said, matters of custody and support are just the sort of thing that can cause a person to fall into financial difficulty. Faced with that situation, you should still make every effort to get ahead, pay off the credit cards, and save some money. Don't let the failure of another person to live up to his/her obligations hold you captive. If eventually the money comes, it will be gravy rather the meat and potatoes you need to survive.

Originally posted by brash This is a far more complicated subject than is worth getting into in this forum, but please do not refer to all "non-support paying parents" as "deadbeat dads". There are plenty of women who do not pay support as well. Stereotypes are part of what has made family law the mess it is today.

This is the exact reason I used the term "Non support paying parents"

Originally posted by mbg If you lost your job through no fault of your own, have been looking for employment seriously since being out of work, have burned out your >=3 months savings, severance and EI and cut back your lifestyle significantly to fit within your new limitations and also kept yourself current in your chosen field while did have a job, I feel empathetic towards your situation.

I'm glad that you did clarify the "losing your job" criteria. To cite myself as an example - the job market isn't great right now, and I'm actually working off of an open-ended contract. In theory, I could receive 2 weeks notice and be out of a job, simply because the company would be forced to downsize. (Thankfully, this does not seem to be a serious threat yet, however we're not doing well enough to hire on the temp/contractors that are working there now, no matter how useful we may be ).

I assume someone didn't like my previous post?
Thats ok I am sure most would have agreed with me.
To bad they won't get to read it.

I assume someone didn't like my previous post?

This one

Originally posted by §weet_N§_Honey Do you think it could be from something you signed up for on here I know sometimes, it asks for phone #, I know some of these companies may not be to thrilled with how many freebie requests they get, we have seen that from some of the emails others have received, most of them are polite, but maybe you got a PO one, who decided to call.

Originally posted by brash This is a far more complicated subject than is worth getting into in this forum, but please do not refer to all "non-support paying parents" as "deadbeat dads". There are plenty of women who do not pay support as well. Stereotypes are part of what has made family law the mess it is today.

Yes, these liberated women get to behave like men, minus the accountability. The media doesn't give this nearly enough attention. Hollywood started to get some balls when they portrayed this in American Beauty, but now it's subsided. We need repeated, persistent pressure to show what is wrong with women today (generalization, of course).

Originally posted by mbg Yes, these liberated women get to behave like men, minus the accountability. The media doesn't give this nearly enough attention. Hollywood started to get some balls when they portrayed this in American Beauty, but now it's subsided. We need repeated, persistent pressure to show what is wrong with women today (generalization, of course).

Wow! Feeling a little misogynistic today? Bitter?
I think most posters agree that it's not just dad's who are deadbeats and that everyone should take responsibility.

In truth, though, no matter what should happen, in practice mothers still tend to have custody after divorce and MOST child support payments (overdue or not) come from fathers.
On average , women's incomes go down after divorce and men's go up.
This thread is about debts. They are not always caused by irresponsibility. Catastrophic events can and do happen. While I agree that everyone should pay their debts the reason why there are laws governing collectors is that not all debt collectors act responsibly-they are paid on commission and some can get overzealous. There is no sense on getting someone fired from their job if you wish them to pay up.
If anyone wishes to avoid debt collectors I strongly urge them to contact a company as soon as they can not pay their debts. Most companies are willing to work out lower payments or even skip a couple if you are honest with them.