Note: This is a satirical and highly uncharacteristic response from me intended for CC -- I don't actually revel in torture.
You forgot last season!
Here's an episode list:
Pilot: Musical Chairs
Fade in to a family portrait: the Pazzi family. Arms, Extortion, Racketeering -- business is either good or merely "OK" depending on who you ask. The right hand man stages a coup, kills his boss, and becomes the boss. He kills a bunch of his friends and weeps openly while they're exucuted to leave no doubt of his ruthlessness. They dub him "Freddo".
Episode 2: Fly Swatter
Fast forward about 6 years: some snotty street gang becomes a nuissance, so he sticks some poison in their water supply and kills 5000 of them and their families just to shut them up -- they were such a pain in the ass! Yeah!
(Glad this was short because it was kind of boring. No fire, no over-the-top Hollywood pyrotechnics, no guts splattering on the camera. The people just covered their mouths (I guess they were holding in their puke), and plainly fell over and died. Those child actors were amazing though! Even the little babies were completely still -- geez, my neice is 2 and I can't get her to stop moving for 5 seconds, nevermind 5 minutes!)
Episode 3-4: Good to Great
Fast forward another 6 years (geez, at this rate this show'll be gone in 3-4 episodes!  ): he gets bored killing his neighbours and insubordinate underlings and decides to grow his business (he's been reading business books). So he surprise attacks the Olio family, way outside his territory. While he's there, just for fun, he finds some people that just happen to live there and figures he might as well play some games with them to take their minds off things. A sampling:
- Tie me to a Pole 'n See How Many Bullets it Takes to Make me Lose my Footing
This is a great TV drinking game!
- Step on My Head 'n Yank Out My Fingernails Till I Pass Out Note to home theatre owners: I blew my goddamn centre speaker watching this game -- those banshees sure do yell loud!
- Plug In the Power Tools 'n Gimme Some New Orifices Because this Desert Climate is Playing Havoc with my Core Temperature
Cable TV sure has come a long way! I remember when they wouldn't even show guns in music videos!
Suffice it to say, this 2-part episode was where the underground cult following started. Fan sites started popping up like gophers!
Episode 4: Deus Ex Machina
The mob boss gets a rude awakening when, out of nowhere, the Olio family calls up another family, the Pastori family, who comes to their rescue.
The next few years business declines for the Pazzis, and even though he manages to get some dough via some donations (bleeding heart sissies!) he keeps it all and uses most of it to buy new Tommy guns for his boys (those who can't hold a gun don't get squat) and build some underground cyanide factories. The cops raid him a few times but he built so many factories that they don't find them all.
The Pastori find out about the factories 'n send some messengers to the Pazzi to "discuss" the situation. For the next 35 minutes they talk, and talk, and talk. Me and my friends dropped our beers we were so sleepy! So finally talks break up (what do you expect from a couple mobsters?) and the episode ends with a whole crapload of the Pastori gearing up, getting into the back of fruit trucks on their way to take care of business. What a lame cliffhanger.
After a few beers me 'n my buds agreed that the show needed a new director. Or something. I mean, what the heck was up with that 35 minutes of blah, blah, blah, blah anyway?
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